We have had drama in the vaping groups since the community started. It would be awesome if it could be stopped and people would get along and help each other and spread the vaping love. Is that going to happen? Probably not. Why you ask? Because believe it or not some people enjoy it and go out of their way to create it.
Most groups do a pretty good job at finding admins that are smart enough to nip it. We have so many wonderful admins that volunteer their time to keep an eye out for the bull and keep it out so that new members are not scared away and so people do not feel threatened. Nobody wants to be a part of a group that they have to fear being attacked if they post something. We all want to feel comfortable within the community. Do not throw a fit and get mad when posts are deleted. They are usually deleted for a very good reason and wanting to see how far it can go and who gets crushed is not a good enough reason to leave a post up. You can argue that it should be left up,but admit it,you just want to see the drama. It’s not helping anyone. Let it go. Do not open another post just to keep it going. Walk away.
Why post mean things to begin with. I see attacks on vendors and personal attacks all the time. Why? If a vendor did something wrong and you tried to get them to rectify it and they refused,I can understand starting a post,but you don’t have to use name calling and nasty comments. People will take you much more seriously if you calmly explain what happened and tell them how you feel. It’s important that people tell the truth and let other vapers know whats going on if a vendor is doing something wrong,but it doesn’t have to be done in a hateful way. Most of the time once its brought out a solution can be found and everyone can walk away happy,but not if its done in an attacking way. Usually that just ends up as a deleted thread and doesn’t accomplish anything. Try being nice. It works much better.
The other thing I see is people stepping out and having small private side groups with friends and people they trust. I belong to several. Some are older vapers that want a place to chat,some are girls only,some are product specific,they have all kinds. I think its good to have small places to talk and feel safe. Just remember one thing. These small private groups are not always a safe haven and you must always be very careful who you invite inside. Not all people are trustworthy. I had this happen to me recently and its kind of shocking to find that people are such drama seekers that they sneak in and copy and paste private conversations and take them to other groups and condemn people for speaking in private even though the stuff was not hatefully posted in an open group. It was private! Do not think for one moment that private means private. Drama seekers will get in and attack in any way they can. They feed off it. I was upset when it happened to me and then the very next day the very same people snuck into another private group,copy and pasted and attacked someone else. I guess it happens all the time. Be very careful who you trust because not everyone deserves that trust. Things said in private should be private and the people you trust should be honest and trustworthy,but that is not the way it works on the interwebs. You will always have drama seekers out there, hunting and searching for ways to swoop in and attack. Be careful! I would much rather deal with an openly mean person than deal with someone who is sneaky and steals private info to hurt people. I guess I honestly never thought about it because it’s just not something I would do. I do not have time to do things like this. Do you? Would you?
Would you take part in something like this?
The main point of this post is Drama is a waste of time and energy. Spend your time doing good things in the vape community. Help the newbies, tell about the great new product you tried, Do whatever you can to help. Spend the energy you have in a positive way. Become part of a group that is moving in a positive direction and leave the negative people behind to stir the pot alone. The fewer people spreading negative energy the less of it that will exist. We need positive people to keep vaping moving forward. We have enough fight going on with the ANTZ and the FDA and Pharm to keep us busy. Lets use our energy to fight for the cause and not cause fighting between ourselves. We wont allow them to destroy our community so why would we allow it to be destroyed from the inside? Keep things positive and do not get involved in the negative. It doesn’t help anyone or anything. Lets all work together and keep the vaping community moving ahead in a strong positive direction!! Please. It’s what we need. Drama does not create itself! It needs to be fed. Do not feed it anymore. Stop allowing it to be an issue. Do not feed the trolls! Let them starve! We just don’t need it.
We need good friends and a strong community.